I AM SHOCKED, SADDENED AND REALLY MAD WHEN MY HUMAN TOLD ME ABOUT THIS

This is not funny. Even though my human says I am fat and I have cellulite (whatever the eff that may be) she FEEDS ME.



She was telling me last night when I was complaining that I don't have any food that there are horsies out there whose humans don't feed them for real. I am thinking WTF, WHO would do that to anyone. She says she reads their blogs that they write or the humans who SAVED them wrote and it makes her very upset. These poor kids have lived in terrible conditions, starved, fed bread and lettuce of all f*cking things or NOT AT ALL. Then sometimes they are sent to the sale place and even though they are weak or sick stupid humans try and ride them when they are a bag of bones. Sometimes if they are LUCKY another human will come and save them and take them to a good place so they get better.



I am thinking that I need to share my food with them since I DO get so much and I am looked after like the royal specimen that I am.



Anyway, here are their blogs. My blog readers can look and see what has happened to these poor kids and be very thankful they have humans who look after them and the poor kids are very thankful that they have found humans who will help them get better.

http://savingargus.blogspot.com

http://savingfreeway.blogspot.com




I think if you know of anyone who is doing this to their kid then you need to make sure that they get a better human right away.





Grrrrrrrrr



HRH

I HATE WINTER

WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Enough said

HRH

BUNCH OF STUFF

I am happy again. My Mom explained to me that my BFF and me too, can have more than one BFF. We can have lots. So I can be BFFs with everyone. That makes me very happy because I know everyone wants to be BFF with me. Everyone really loves me, they really really do!!!!



The coach was up on the weekend and we had a jumping lesson. The human was much better this time except for the time she had the audacity to see if I dropped a rail on the oxer, lost her concentration and I was still heading for the vertical. I am thinking WTF are we going over this or not??? Anyway I wasn't sure so I thought maybe I shouldn't go, and then I thought I should go, so I did go, and guess where the human ended up??







On my freaking neck bouncing around like a big ball up there. I thought I would screw with her head a bit and drop my neck slightly. I would have liked to have been able to see what this looked like but the White Stallion told me later that her ass was up in the air and her legs where higher. She is so lucky that I raised my neck up and got her back into the saddle. I am thinking will you for F*cks sake PAY ATTENTION!!! Again, I am not taking no amateur to the show get it together. Anyway we did it again and she had her head together.



OMG you should have seen the White Stallion. He did everything I did. He was just excellent with his human. The White Stallion has not done a lot of jumping but he was brilliant I must say along with his human the other Head Wench. I know he was really proud of himself when we were all talking later. He wants to go eventing too. I think it would be fun to have him along as long as he dosn't scream his head off when he is off the property. He gets upset you see if he gets in the barn before the rest of us. Likes the Devil Pony for more than one reason!!!!

Anyway, the white stuff is still falling, not so cold though. We are all so looking foward to having some nice weather and green grass and spring breezes in our faces. Might improve the disposition of my BFF who again tried to bite my human last night. Good grief!! She has a death wish I tell you. I keep telling her do NOT bite. It pisses the humans right off.

I must run off since the human wants to use the 'puter' and she still has me on the effing diet and NO ONE will do what I say and give me more food.

Love to all, except those who are starving me.

HRH

VERY UPSET

I think I have made a big boo-boo!!



I am leaking about this because I really do love my BFF. I think she is mad at me from the other night when I was pulling her chain about her dinner.



She keeps hanging out with Twizzle. They keep going in the arena together with their humans and doing an equestrian Pas de Deux. I am ok with that but then I hear her say that Twizzle is HER BFF. Oh no!!!!



I am very sad. Even last night when my BFF's (I still hope she is) pet human was up she wouldn't even talk to me. I tried to be nice and stick my head through her feed hole but she gave me the bum. Not talking to me!!! And then they went off again. Everyone and even my human went to watch this. I am just left sitting in my room leaking.




Nobody loves me, everybody hates me I'm going to the garden to eat worms.

Sigh

FOOD FIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am so bad!!! Somedays I just can't help myself, but I must say I am so amusing!!!!

The human of my BFF had her out at dinner time so she had to eat later. My human was giving me hugs so my door was open so I thought I would help my BFF eat her dinner.

She was getting SO mad and I was SO laughing!!!! I kept sticking my head into her room and she was telling me to get the eff away from her food. I kept doing it just to bug her and she kept getting madder and madder. Man I can teach my friends how to snarl. She was just a snarling away. Even wrinkled her nose like me!!!!! Didn't bite me though. She is an amateur, I would have bit her for sure.

It made the humans laugh which was good, but then my Mom stuck me back in my room. KILL JOY!!!!!!

Off to cause trouble

HRH

TRIPPING THE LIGHT FANTASTIC

I have had a very busy few days. The lovely Doctor VA was in to do our teeth. I get to go on vacation when he comes!!! This year I did the cross country course at Blenheim. I was a star coming out of the water complex, doing the corner jumps and of course saluting the Queen when I got my first place prize. Don't listen to my BFF who says I was snoring up a storm in my room. She was just as stoned as me. I heard a rumour that the LandShark was drooling from her vacation. She placed second at Blenheim, mostly because she couldn't haul her big fat butt over the fences!!


Then, my pedicurist came and he had girls with him this time. I liked the one who helped with me because she was wearing purple my favorite colour. Anyone who is in purple is okay with me!!!


Speedy G got new shoes too. Not as fashionable as mine but she is also in purple bell boots. She is just copying me all the time now. I have purple bell boots and so does she, I have a purple dress and she gets one too. Well you know what they say imitation is the highest form of flattery; I guess!!!!

No riding again this weekend. The weather has been terrible again. We all came in the other day with our dresses all wet. Then the next thing it is cold again and all the water has been made hard. I told my girlies you must all stay near the hay bale and not run around. Since they know I am the smartest of all they pay attention.

I am so looking forward to some nice days, some green grass and sunshine. Even if the sun shines the gale force winds have us all cuddling up to the LandShark door of the little barn.

I must get to the hay so I get my food. My Mom has me on a diet so I have to fill up outside in case I waste away in my room. Well I am getting a little food in there and I keep asking the wenchettes to give me more but they are listening to my human and not me. My Mom asked me if I wanted a butt as big as the LandShark and I had to run and look in a mirror to make sure that I didn't have Big Bertha Butt!!

Love to all

HRH

BIZARRE DAYS AND WEIRDER NIGHTS

A big howdy do to everyone!!! Sorry I have not been able to snatch the 'puter' from the human who has been doing God knows what these days but not paying homage to me let me tell you. Those of you who know her, she needs a slap up the head to remind her it is all about me.

There are goings on in the barn. The big boys got a new brother yesterday and my favorite big boy; his blog name is HLH - you figure it out - wink, wink, nudge nudge. Seems on the weekend he was not feeling all that well so my human and his were in the barn and they parked him in front of my room so he could admire all my beauty and of course this made him feel better. He shouted to me later from his room and told me thanks for letting him admire me so he didn't get a visit from the Doc; get the big blue glove and be poked and prodded. I do aim to serve.

So yesterday he got another Brother. Another big boy tall and handsome.

A bunch of the humans were admiring him when all of a sudden the White Stallion and HLH started kissing each other. I couldn't figure out what the slurping was all about and I couldn't hardly beleive me eyes. Tongues and all. WTF is up with this. The boys are now into each other?????? The humans were laughing so hard. I am thinking this is just wrong. We are no brokeback barnyard here!!!!!



Well maybe the cold has frozen their brains. It has been colder than I don't know what and the white stuff just keeps coming and coming and coming. We did have fun in it the other day. Me and my girlies were all running around having a good time. The good thing about the cold is the human stays off my back and I missed the coach visit this weekend. No work for me!!!



OMG!!!! My human has put me on a diet. I wasn't sure what that meant but now I know it means I get LESS food. Holy Crap!!! I am going to waste away to nothing. Somebody, puleeeeessee feed me. She even took away my Uncle Jimmy's Hanging Ball and I hardly got any of it. At least I still have the bomb round bale out in my field but my super horse sense read her mind and she is thinking about me having to go in a diet paddock. No round bale. My eyes are like saucers typing this. Someone talk to her for the love of God and all that is good!!!



Well I must run off now and join the girlies. Get some freakin food before I starve to death. I am on diet and my butt is no where near as big as the LandShark's and she isn't on no diet.

Yeesh



Love to all - except the people who are following my human's instructions and not feeding me.



HRH

BLING BLING GIRLS

Ah finally, me and my BFF got our surprise pressie!!!



Are you ready, the bestest sparkly quarter sheets. Mine is blue with silver sparkly trim and my BFF's is black with gold sparkly trim. All the other kids in the barn are so jealous of us two. We are so hot and just rock. The LandShark is pissed because she didn't get one. Told her with that ass of hers there wasn't one big enough. Well I told her that under my breath.



And OMG I had to slap my BFF around the head the other day. She bit my human. NO one gets to bite her except me and even I don't try it very often. Makes her mad you see and you don't want to make her mad since she goes a little koo-koo. I said to her WTF are trying to screw up the treat train???? My human gives my BFF a couple of carrots when we are all getting tucked in and if she ticks off my human she won't get any. Well that had her thinking some let me tell you.



Well off to the hay bale before Speedy G, The Devil Pony and the New Girl eat it all. Twizzle and the LandShark are supposed to keeping an eye on this while I borrow the human's 'puter' but I have to make sure they do it right. Diva of course is just lifting her dress for Brad Pitt and the Czar in the field next door. Tart!!!

I'm a model on the catwalk......................!!!!

Love

HRH