I have just the best life. I'm all dressed up in my purple rain sheet looking so hot and guess what??????? Brad Pitt thinks I'm all that so he went out and got the same one. Now of course I am still a little miffed by his wait in line comment last week so I'm not letting him know that I think he is really hot too.
LandShark said last week that she knows more boys on the farm so I have made it my mission to meet them all and I have met Mr. Cool. Tall dark and very handsome is he and he lives in my barn down the aisle from Brad Pitt. I think he is really sexy too. He hangs out in the paddock over the driveway near the White Stallion and Stinky. He can see me from his field and I have noticed him looking at me with sexy eyes. Boys oh Boys more boys for me!!!! Now if I can just convince the human that I have needs that don't involve a big blue glove.
We have had a new gal join out little herd. Another chestnut mare like my BFF, Twizzle and LandShark. She is nice though. LandShark went right up to her when she came in and said I am the boss, don't you forget it EVER. The new gal said ok fine. I went over and spoke to her but she was kinda spooked after the LandShark spoke to her and I have explained to her that even though the LandShark THINKS she is the boss, she had better pay heed to me since I am the one really in charge. Stop your laughing BFF and Twizzle, see my face not looking nicey nicey at the two of you. I MEAN it stop laughing at me.
Oh the hell with you two. Oh LandShark, Twizzle and my BFF says your butt is really, really big!!!!
Don't mess with me, I can be evil.
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
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4 comments:
Too bad I'm stuck here on the island with the gray beast and my human,we could tour the town in our matching purple rain sheet,mine is purple and black,ripstop they call it but because the gray beast got one too,I thought I'd test the 'ripstop' therory and guess what...its false,got my newly floated teetrh into hers and tore a big hole in it,hehehe, should have sen my human HRH,she was so mad.Anyway, I tried to run away to come join you other night when my human forgot to lock my gate but as I was going out the front door I got side tracked and stopped for a snack of 50/50 hay cubes....got three quarters of a bag gone before the human caught me,then I made it to the lawn but the green grass was too tempting and my plan of escape was foiled....well,human put me back and I drank a full bucket of water before she got the bucket away and then she tormented all night by coming to check on me every two hours,I got no rest....what was she thinking
ohohoh...forgot also to tell you...vet came to see me and being the sly one that I am i pretended to be quiet and well mannered so that he like all the rest will think my human is nuts in saying that I am a demon to ride hehe,anywaY, appears that I will be getting new shoes soon,I like him,think I'll do something else to make him come visit me again,,,any thoughts?She mentioned him again when I ate the cubes so maybe next time I'll hurry and eat more....
I have been having great fun with the gray beast,she gets a Hanibal Lector mask..thats what my human calls it....every night...I laugh at her and make great fun,,,then she kicks the wall and GUESS who gets yelled at...HER...oh the enjoyment of it all.....oh no,gotta run...literally....the humans are coming with saddles and I do NOT like the color of that saddle pad....lime green WILL NOT be put on me....NO way....its that new human who's been coming here...thinks she can dress me up,,,no siree,royal blue is my color and I will refuse...
Lordy, lordy you have been up to it eh. I heard over the hayfield express that you had packed your bags and were coming out and me and my BFF were talking about what room we were going to give you. Foiled by the Food Fairy. This is something the humans do to keep us in line. I like to snatch a bale of hay when I come in. I make sure I pick the whole thing up and give it a little shake so the human is wearing some. This way I can pick it off her later when she comes to give me treats.
By the way it is better to stick you teeth into the Grey Beast and not her sheet. Well it is better if you can get both at the same time. What is a Hanibal Lector mask. This is not something I have and I am under the impression I have and get everything.
I have special shoes too. They are very fashionable. I am on the only one in the barn that has this type.
Sometimes my human comes into the barn many times a night on poop patrol. She does this because usually one of the other kids is sick and none of us get any rest on these nights. She comes in turns on the lights and we are all like is it time for breakfast. I am laying down and she has to come and check me too. Nothing wrong with me I say, either feed me now or get the hell back to bed.
I must tell you though, you must at least pretend to be nice to your human. They have this thing called cash you see and this is how you get your stuff. You don't want to make them upset so that you get a different human. This has happened to me before I owned my current human and I was scared and upset because you know I must have the finer things in life and I never got nothin, till my human came and promised to look after me. So I decided to be nice to her most of the time. Otherwise she leaks and you know how I feel about that.
Talk Soon
HRH
WELL! The audacity of that new human who has been coming to MY barn! She came yesterday with a new PINK saddle pad AND new pink SPARKLY socks for the gray beast and NOTHING for me. I am protesting and NO ONE is listening. MY human ooh and aawed and I have been thinking ever since on what I can do to make her leak,,,,nearly got her this morning when she let me out, I was about to run accross the lawn and tear it up good on my way over to see lil Red(thats the pony over the way)...but then I saw hay piled high and stopped for a breather and a nibble and the human caught me before I got moving again. I gave her the evil eye but she didn't notice,it was too dark at 5:15am BUT I did get a bit of satisfaction when she tried to put up the yellow stingy fence and the post broke,she nearly leaked then too.Anyway, back to the nerve of that other new human,She obviously DOES NOT KNOW who she is dealing with...I tried to remind her other day when I nipped her finger but she didn't learn,just came with more stuff for skinny arse next door,thats new boots,new pad and sparkly socks....now my sparkly boots still make me look like the Queen Supreme' that I am , however.....
My human calls the new one Jennifer and goes on and on about how nice she is so I fear I may be stuck with her for awhile. She does share treats with me but I want STUFF, mom says I do not get anything new these days because I am so bad when she rides me,well just wait till next time she gets on,I will have new shoes then though so I'll see what kind of mood I'm in,hay HRH, got any stalls? I'm thinking of ditching this place and coming to visit you,lil Red said he'll come too,he hates being tied on and having no other friends.Maybe we'll see you soon.
Island Princess
OMG - You have a substitute human to deal with. What is up with that?????? How come????
I wouldn't like to have to train another one. I have mine trained really well. I am busy doing my latest entry and you will be able to read all about it very soon. I also have her looking into some new stuff for me that comes from over the pond, Ireland I think.
Just rude to not bring YOU things. I mean REALLY. That would be like my human getting stuff for the White Stallion and getting nothing for me. Not like that would ever happen. I would just stomp my hoof and then rip it off him for sure. She KNOWS better!!
We do have stalls but I snuck into her email again and I saw all the beautiful pictures of where you live I rather think we should come and visit you. Is there a room for me for a while?? We could show off our superior selves and all the other horses can be really jealous just looking at us.
I could use a change of scenery for a while
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